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AW-Class8-2006

Rewriting Thesis statements:

Original: I passed by some processes which are my thoughts before I entered OJC, these when I was 1st year student, and the present my thoughts.

Rewrite: My thoughts leading to choosing International Cooperation as a major has changed from high school to my first year in college to my current thinking.

For the final research essay:

1. Rewrite your thesis statements if they need to be clearer. Make sure they are parallel.
2. Improve your outlines: uses sentences instead of phrases.